Theory of relativity according to my daughter

very-happy-babyJust a few examples to show that there are no certainties and the reason I will answer “it depends” to many questions my mother-in-law will ask me about my daughter:

1. Sleep pattern

At the nursery – she takes a long nap up to 2,5 hours every day.

At home – 45 minutes flat kicking and screaming when we carry her to her bed (even though she has been rubbing her eyes minutes before).

Falls asleep within minutes of being brought out in the buggy (she has almost never seen the ducks in the park as she is fast asleep before we even get there).

2. Food

At the nursery – she eats both her vegetables and her fruits (full bowl and sometimes even a little extra), possibly copying a boy in her group who is such a good eater we are considering using his name as a new measure for food quantities (How much has she eaten today? One B or one B and a half ?…)

At home – a bowl of lovingly picked and steamed vegetables, some pureed, some mashed, some in pieces so that she has the choice – will not eat any. Porridge – will eat 2 spoons, adding yoghurt – 3 more spoons. Daddy takes cream cheese out of the fridge – will not eat anything anymore until we give her some cream cheese on a finger. If we give it on bread, will lick it off bread and throw the bread under the table for the cat to eat. Soup appears to be poisoned, otherwise I cannot explain the screaming when I approach the spoon to her mouth. Refusing it is a matter of survival.

In a restaurant – eats happily anything that comes off our plates including pieces of olives, hamburger, big piece of pineapple wedged on the detox fruit juice glass and drinks from mommy’s big girl glass cause the bottle is no fun.

In the car – cranky if no bottle with milk is provided.

Exceptionally: accepts little pieces of fruit while playing.

Best meal: happy to eat the cat food out of his bowl or a dirty and cat-hair-covered biscuit she has stashed in her box of toys.

3. Water

Loves her bath everyday, could stay there for hours.

Plays with water wherever she finds it, including in the toilet if the door to the bathroom stays open. Washes her hands in her water cup at mealtimes. Tries to climb into the bathtub when her dad is having his shower.

Yet screams and cries when she gets water on her head.

4. First words

Says daddy when daddy not at home, looking longingly at the door. Says daddy when she sees a man on TV or in a book. Says daddy to herself fifty times a day while playing. Says “daddy” when mommy asks her: say “mommy”.

Calls the cat (very distinctly) by its name since she was eight month old.

Says “mommy” once when she wants the boob before bed, looking intensely at my cleavage.

5. Toys

Not interested in expensive “educational toys”, ignores puzzles, blocks and plush teddy bears. Plays most with a cardboard box her dad got his photo supplies in, an old wooden box full of colourful teabags she empties and refills and the cat’s water bowl. Ignores nicely prepared “Montessori type baskets with meaningful activities” and repeatedly explores her dad’s music CD collection. Has a preference for the “all Mozart collection” on CDs as edited by Le Monde. Can’t put on a sock, but knows how to switch on my iPhone and works the buttons on the printer and the washing machine. Throws away the dummy – only wants to suck on the empty dose of saline I have used to clean her nose.

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