Just a quick note today: I actually have tons of work… phonecalls to make, hundreds of e-mails, urgent files to deal with. My daughter is more active than ever, as she just started to walk this summer, so needs to be watched constantly as she explores her environment.
The common illusion is that one writes when one has time. I also tend to believe that I would write more if I had more free time. But then I don’t. The evidence from my own experience is overwhelming. I just came back from 2 weeks of holidays and I have not written a line for those two weeks.
As mentioned above, I am now back at work. And although there are millions of other things I should be doing, I feel the irresistible urge to write, draw, create… And – surprise! surprise! – as I rush through my day, I actually manage to find a tiny slot to write – at lunchtime, before opening my inbox in the morning, late at night, before going to bed… I draft my posts in the car (when someone else is driving, of course). I think about writing, when I am rushing about doing other things.
The paradox is that this is exactly the atmosphere that I need to be really inspired… The pressure and the stress put my brain in exactly the right mode for coming up with the right words, the right waves for creation. I am most prolific at times when I use writing to avoid doing other things. My creative procrastination. I think of it as letting off some steam from the machine… Otherwise I would explode.
When I started working, I had a boss, a fiftyish man, very smart and well-educated, a real role model who used to impress all of us young people who worked with him with his efficiency and the sheer volume of his output. He was hyperactive, managed a whole bunch of people, read everything we produced, corrected, rewrote, had dozens of important meetings every week, travelled extensively and still managed to write and publish on average two books (on professional matters) per year. I understand that he was also an insomniac and slept only a few hours every night. I couldn’t understand how he did that before, but since I have kissed my long night sleep goodbye last year (hello baby !), I am starting to understand how that could actually work.
So stress is good for something. If this goes on, perhaps I will even publish a book one day… Just please, keep me busy. 🙂